The toughest emotion in my perspective, is, to let go.
As a child we cling on to that toy, that stuffed doll or the macho figure that we carry everywhere. We hold on to it for years, not because we need it,but because we cannot give it away or throw it away. We refrain from sharing and hold it close to our heart and body. As we grow up, we emotionally grow to reach a state where we give up the toy.
When we leave the familiar environment of school, it is difficult to say bye to our friends and teachers. Tomorrow I would not wake up and wear my uniform and go to school. My uniform would just hang there reminding me of the wonderful years I spent at school.
The same episode repeats at college. Just that this time it’s a lot harder, because by now relationships are a little deeper than school. If you live in a hostel then it’s a family you leave. All this while you have lived away from your parents, but you know you will get back there.
The hardest, or so we think while we are there, is letting go of the person you love. This is where you learn that the harder you hang on to him or her, the more the person will distance themselves from you. All those mushy break up Hallmark cards.. Oh God!
When we get married (Indian women) we move into our husband’s house (atleast most of us). We don’t let go of our parents, but we let go of the carefree girls we were till that moment. We turn into wife, daughter in law, sister in law and what not, overnight !
Then life happens! We move to different cities, leave our comfort zones many times. Each time we resolve that, enough, this is the last time. The very next thing you know, we are packing again. The friends, community, relationships. The whole physical toll of moving is best not spoken about. Again and again, we go through this rigorous emotional tumult. But there is nothing that we can do, just let go.
Of course, the toughest is when a person passes. I have written enough about it, so I am not delving into that again.
Just as we get complacent, a new hurdle appears from nowhere. It takes all your emotional strength to jump the hurdle. But you have no choice, you just have to jump ! The toughest of these hurdles is letting go of something dear to your heart, like that old stuffed toy..