why do u love me, he asks
i dont know say I
at first
then I think
why do I love him
what is it
that makes me feel
like he is my world
like my thoughts begin
with him
like the smile on my face
is because of a smile on his
like when he turns away
my world is shattered
what is it
that makes me smile from within
at a thought of his
like he makes me laugh
like my every thing counts
like i make a difference
in his world
like he makes me, me..
In the busy moments of everydays
Do you my love
Think about our clandestine moments
Moments hidden away in our world
Times that are just ours
Do you relive and feel me
Lost in your arms
Surrounded by the silence of the room
And the noise of our breaths
In the busy moments of everydays
Do you my love
Miss me
Like I do.
southern winds, when you arrive
i’ll be gone to distant lands
you will fall as pitter patter raindrops
you will touch the earth as tiny specks of snow
when you arrive the leaves will leave the trees barren
ready for you to turn them into white
and before the leaves fall,
they will display all their hues
a vision to feast upon
when the first snow falls
i see him looking up to the sky with beaming eyes
a shiver creeping up his arms
rubbing his hands together, wrapped in wool
i see him standing
waiting for me..
I am touched
and made beautiful by you
I am held
in your arms
like no thing could touch me
I am looked at
with all the love you can give
I am loved
and made to matter so much
to you
So much that
a line of sadness
draws concern
Why am I being loved
like there is no end
Why am I being held
like the world converges
where your arms meet
around me
I ask the whys
But have no answers
You ask me the same whys
And I have no answers
Walking side by side
Till the end of the road
You my shadow
And me yours..
The first drop of blood drips on the floor. I see the slit clearly now. Slowly its going to fade, I know. I made the slit a few seconds ago. The blood came gushing in faster than I thought. They are dripping one by one onto the white tub. A perfect visual of white and red. Like polka dots on a white sheath. My life rolls by in front of my eyes. The mind is so calm. There is no panic today, no fear. I am ending this. It is not because of lack of anything. But simply, the urge to live. That is what I have lost completely.
I start at the beginning, and race by till the end. Which exact moment was it when I lost the urge to live. I am not sure. Maybe it was building up and finally vented out like a dormant volcano. The lava now spurting out onto my bathtub. Should I open the tap, I don’t know. I have seen it in the movies, but I don’t know. So I will just leave it at that. My eyes are closing now. Did I hear a knock? No, it cannot happen. Nobody can walk in now and spoil my perfectly laid out plan. Everyone is away somewhere or the other in this part of the world. Doing what they do everyday. But I don’t want to do it anymore. I have had my share of life. And since nobody is going to take me away, I decided to take myself away. In the fading moments of life I write ‘too dumb to live’.
indupatikkal 